The Stawberry Spaz
by killua rox 123
Summary: killua kruapika and zetsu are all alone together when out of randomness killua has a spaz about choclate milk. rated t for mild launguage.


The Strawberry Spaz

By: Jingles and Zetsu

One day, Zetsu, Killua and Kurapika were alone in their hotel room and were extremely bored. Gon had gone somewhere to rescue some random pig. Leorio was out being a pervert as usual. The rest of the Akatsuki were out on a special mission. That mission was to torture Saske and Sakura. Of course, poor Zetsu was not allowed to join this mission for he may accidentally eat them and ruin the fun. So, basically, they were REALLY, REALLY, FRIGGIN BORED!

Zetsu just had to point out the obvious, "It's really friggin boring around here." He then looked over at Kurapika who was fully engrossed in reading some really boring looking magenta book. Zetsu started to smack his lips but luckily Killua noticed this and gave him one of those crazy assassin stares. Zetsu immediately backed off.

Kurapika then apparently became bored with his potentially boring magenta book and threw it across room. The book barely missed hitting one of Zetsu's Venus fly trap things.

"Watch where you're throwing god damn friggin boring magenta books that are apparently really friggin BORING!" Zetsu screamed.

"Well, if you didn't have such a big head maybe it wouldn't have almost hit you!" Kurapika yelled.

"It's a friggin Venus fly trap for god's sake! God damn it, you're worse then friggin blind Itachi!"

Kurapika and Zetsu then started smacking each other with other really boring books in various colors of the rainbow. Killua had been watching tv (god knows what) while this was going on. But then Killua noticed that he was extremely thirsty.

"I WANT SOME FRIGGIN CHOCOLATE MILK!" Killua yelled over all the noise.

Kurapika and Zetsu immediately stopped throwing the friggin books and just stared at Killua. "What the fuck was that?" Zetsu screamed.

Killua just gave them a look that can make Itachi have nightmares. Then he said, "God damn it! What do you think that was? It was me saying I want SOME FRIGGIN CHOCOLATE MILK! God damn it are you guys friggin deaf! I said I want some friggin chocolate milk and I want it NOW!"

Kurapika and Zetsu just stared at each other with scared looks on their faces. Killua just stared at them. "I'm gonna say this one more time. I WANT FRIGGIN CHOCOLATE MILK! NOW GO GET IT GOD DAMN IT!" Killua yelled at them. Kurapika just got so damn scared that he ran into the kitchen to get Killua's damn milk. He was too scared to pay attention to which container was which, so he just groped around for the first thing that felt like milk.

Kurapika walked back into the living room to see Zetsu in a fetal position in the corner of the room rocking while sucking his thumb (how he did this with a giant fly trap on his head and hands that are never seen, we may never know). He was also whispering to himself. Kurapika could barely make it out but it sounded something like he was repeatedly saying chocolate milk.

Killua noticed the container in Kurapika's hands and immediately attacked. He wanted the damn milk really friggin badly and he couldn't wait one more god damn second for the friggin stuff. He didn't even pay attention to the label. He just ripped it open (and spilling it all over his shirt) and started guzzling it down. Kurapika just stared at him drinking out of the container when he finally read the label. It read: **STRAWBERRY MILK**. Kurapika knew that it was only moments until Killua threw another fit. And he was right.

Killua spit out all the pink stuff all over Zetsu and flung the container at Kurapika's head. He got a clear shot which knocked him down on top of a dripping wet pink Zetsu.

"Why did you spit the god damn pinkness all over me? I'm not the friggin idiot who mistook strawberry pinkyness milk instead of chocolate milk! That was friggin Kurapika, god damn it! He's the one who deserves to be pinkified, not me!" Zetsu cried.

Kurapika was out cold on the floor. This was not from being hit with the container. It was instead from the fear that went into his brain of what he would have to deal with.

Killua then finally got over the shock of having had the dreaded pink milk in his mouth and jumped on top of Kurapika, waking him up.

"YOU FRIGGIN IDIOT! YOU MISTAKE FRIGGIN GOD DAMN CRAPPY STRAWBERRY MILK FOR THE YUMMY DELICOUSNESS OF CHOCOLATELY GOODNESS MILK! WHAT KIND OF IDIOT CAN SCREW THAT UP! ALL I ASK IS FOR SOME FRIGGIN CHOCOLATE MILK! IT'S NOT MUCH TO ASK FOR CONSIDERING I DON'T GET SQUAT AROUND HERE!..." Killua yelled. That was all Kurapika could make out of the rambling Killua was doing. Other than that, Zetsu, who had been underneath Kurapika, had jumped up from his position. He in result had knocked over Kurapika causing Killua to fly into the container of strawberry milk and getting it all over himself. Before Kurapika could run out, Zetsu had already taken the keys, ran outside, locked the door and gone to the grocery store (still covered in the evilness of pink god damn strawberry milk) to buy an endless supply of chocolate milk.

Killua then looked up at Kurapika. He had finally gotten over the shock of falling into the mess of pink evil. Kurapika didn't know what to do. He just backed up into the corner as Killua slowly walked toward him….

Zetsu was running down the hundreds of stairs going down the hotel (since they were on the top floor and his head didn't fit in the elevator) when he heard a scream. _Holy Crap! That sounded like Kurapika! _He thought about the possibilities some more. _Uh Oh…_

Later that day:

Finally, at 7 o'clock at night, Gon, Leorio, and the Akatsuki decided to come home. When they walked into their hotel room (which just happened to be the whole top floor of the hotel) they were in shock.

Zetsu was in a fetal position in the farthest corner of the room sucking his thumb and rocking. He had some strange pink goo all over him. Poor Kurapika was knocked out cold in the middle of the room, all beat up. Killua was happily watching television while gulping down bowls upon bowls of chocolate milk. There just so happened to be at least 10 containers of the chocolately goodness empty next to the couch. On the other side of Killua was a tower of boxes, all filled with chocolate milk containers. There happened to be pink goo (just like what's on Zetsu) all over the walls and floor. There was also one empty, squished and ripped container of strawberry milk lying next to Kurapika's head.

"What the fuck?" cried Itachi.

After that sudden outburst, everyone else in the room finally figured out what had happened. After realizing this, everyone in the Akatsuki burst out laughing at his current condition. Both Gon and Leorio rushed up to Kurapika to make sure he was ok. When they realized he was fine, they also started laughing.

Killua finally came out of his chocolate trance when he heard them laughing. He gave all them one of his evil assassin looks and immediately the room went dead quiet except for the sounds of the tv, Killua drinking chocolate milk, and Zetsu sucking his thumb.

From then on, everyone in the house made sure there was always a large supply of chocolate milk in the fridge or mini bar or in the main lobby before leaving Killua alone (by himself or with others). And don't forget they always made sure there was no pink ANYTHING anywhere in the house (specifically the strawberry milk).

THE END!


End file.
